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10 Quick, Succinct And Largely Painless Premier League Predictions For 2018/19 Season

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No messing about. Here’s Pies’ 10 sultry, slimline predictions for the 2018/19 Premier League season…

1. Man City will win the league at a canter. Nobody looks like making up that 19-point gap.

2. Top six will be City at the summit with Liverpool closest then Manchester United, Arsenal, Tottenham and Chelsea all furlongs behind.

3. The relegation vortex will probably be far more interesting again, but we think Cardiff, Huddersfield and Southampton (though Newcastle could also fall apart if Rafa Benitez walks).

4. Naby Keita will be an excellent addition to the Liverpool team. He looks tailor-made for the exciting rigours of the Premier League.

5. Transfer flop? Richarlison. Never been a £50million player.

6. Surprise package? Fulham will be great fun. Over £100million spent on a dozen summer signings, some silken midfielders and Alexandar Mitrovic leading the line with his elbows.

7. We’re also looking forward to seeing how Arsenal fare without their wizened overlord of yore in charge. Finger’s crossed for plenty of exciting attacking football with some sensible adults fielded in defence for a change.

8. The boring choice for Premier League Golden Boot winner is Harry Kane (again), but we think Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang will run him close. Honestly, we can’t see Mohamed Salah repeating his feats from last year.

9. We won’t have to wait long for the first managerial casualty. Neil Warnock is probably the most obvious candidate, but Pies’ pick is Javier Gracia on the grounds that nobody can quite remember who he is anyway*.

(*He’s the Watford manager.)

10. Player of the Year? Kevin de Bruyne is likely to sew it up after coming so close last season, but the aforementioned Keita has a potential monster debut campaign in him.

So, there you go Pies fans. That’s our colours nailed firmly to the mast of destiny.

Care to have a bash?